April 24 - Had my appointment with Dr. C last Thursday. Everything is looking good as far as the cancer not coming back and the swelling continuing to go down. I asked him about the ongoing thrush. He said I will likely have chronic thrush for the rest of my life. He said that a large percentage of people who have radiation done to the head and neck end up with it. He said that the radiation permanently changes the "flora" in your mouth. I told him I was sort of hoping that once I start producing normal amounts of spit, the thrush might go away. He said 'maybe' while shaking his head in the negative. You gotta love the mixed signals there!

He had me smile for the PA and was telling her that you can tell my "something" muscle (I didn't catch the complicated name for it) was snapping back into place. I had been wondering about that! My smile has been 'off' for months and since it was my all time most favorite thing about myself, I was a wee bit pissed. I've noticed in pictures recently though that it's starting to get back to normally. At least one thing will eventually go back to the way it was!

I also talked to him about the debulking. He had told me that we could assess it after 12 months. Now he's saying I'll probably want to wait 18 months. I complained that I can no longer really laugh, or sing, or hit high notes with my voice, etc. I constantly sound hoarse, like I'm coming down with a cold (I've had numerous concerned customers ask me that exact thing on the phone!) He basically said I'm going to have to accept the fact that changes like that might be permanent and 'it is what it is'.

Needless to say, I cried while driving home from that appointment. Dude is never very cheering and as I mentioned previously, I think this damn implant is effing with my emotions. Whatever. I have a man who's crazy about me, an awesome circle of friends, exciting goals ahead of me......my life rocks despite this whole tongue business. :-)

My knee is still slightly tweaked but I ran the 5k last Saturday anyway. The weird thing was that running actually made my knee feel good! Kind of warmed it up and stretched it out. The race itself was fun! They throw powdered paint on you throughout the event. The only fly in the ointment is that it hailed during the race. Can I tell you how painful it is to run face first into windy hail??

Meanwhile, another 5k this Sunday and I think Scott wants to sign up for one to do together on May 11th so this running thing seems to be sticking with me!

I was just re-reading the last blog. The itchy thing with my ribcage went away at some point in time. I never did figure out what that was all about.
 
My blonde move of the week. I made strawberry shortcake for dessert the other night. I made sure to make some simple syrup to add to it because at this time of year, strawberries just aren't that sweet. So, Scott and I were eating it and I complained that the simple syrup still didn't really sweeten up the tartness of the strawberries. Scott just looked at me for a second and then let me know that it actually was sweet, although not overly so. It was at that point that I remembered that I currently can't taste sweet. What the hell was I thinking? I can't believe I completely and utterly forgot about my messed up taste buds for an entire 30 seconds!! I can't figure out if I'm losing my mind or if I've gotten so used to the 'handicaps' that I've been living with that they've faded into the background.

Improvements:
- Thrush sucks but it sounds like I'm going to have to learn to live with it.
 - Lack of spit still making eating somewhat difficult but it's getting better.
- Bullfrog effect still happening in the morning and when I eat salty foods.
- Garbled talking - Plus I've noticed that I've been accidentally biting my "flap" when I talk for the past week now. I think it might be because I keep trying to talk at the speed I used to talk at and I just don't think it's doable anymore. I need to slow it down and keep it slowed down.
- Partial taste buds - Sweet is still waking up slowly.
-Still losing hair but it has definitely slowed down at this point. New growth is coming in now too and I have an alfalfa thing going on. I keep trying to brillocream it down but it just doesn't want to go. Kind of cracks me up......


Fun stuff:


Hardwoods have been installed! They're beautiful! Now I just need to find the time to assemble all the darned furniture I bought for the front room so that it can once again be my office......

Patilda, T, and I had an absolutely fabulous weekend together! Wicked was most excellent, and hanging out with the peeps does the body good!

Sunday night I went to dinner with Kit and Dohi-san. We wanted to go to Tavern 58 but it turns out they're closed on Sundays! That's crazy! We ended up at Pomodoro's which is another fave of mine. As I'm sure the waitress could tell since I had just been there the night before with Patilda and T! Ha!

This weekend Scott and I are playing 18 holes at Durand on Saturday and then I have my 5k on Sunday. A fairly mellow weekend for once, thank goodness. I found the absolute best recipe for BBQ pork ribs on allrecipes.com so I'm going to do some of those up on the grill this weekend as a special treat to celebrate the gorgeous weather we're supposed to finally have! Woo hoo!